English Teacher Re-Titles Classic Poems As Clickbait In Last-Ditch Effort To Trick Students Into Learning

High School for Technology and Communication

Ms. Greene    

English 12 Syllabus

Unit: Poetry  

 

Student Task:
Read the following poems (also posted to your instagram, twitter, tumblr, snapchat, tinder, apple watch, hoverboard, wifi hotspot, $300 headphones, etc.). Tweet, snap, gram, or mind-beam your thoughtful, text-based responses to each piece.

Assigned Texts:

“8 Squad Goals You Should Get Rid Of RN” by Gwendolyn Brooks

“The Relatable Reasons Why I Literally Do Not Have Time For Death” by Emily Dickinson

“5 Ways To Complicate Your Decision-Making Process” by Robert Frost

“Dis Fruit Ain’t Loyal” by William Carlos Williams

“Confessions Of An Angst-Ridden Sailor Who Took Out His Emotions On The Wrong Bird” by Samuel Taylor Coleridge

“13 Ways To Have No Chill When It Late At Night & You Lonely AF”  by Edgar Allan Poe

“This Tyger Is Way Too Turnt” by William Blake

“3 Foods You Never Knew You Could Compare To Your Dreams” by Langston Hughes  

“You’ll Never Guess Why This Caged Bird Sings” by Maya Angelou  

“An Anthem For F*ckbois” by Andrew Marvell

“This Reason Why Money Can’t Buy You Happiness Will Destroy You” by Edwin Arlington Robinson

“Why You Should Turn Up On the Regular” by Dylan Thomas

“Can We Guess The Fate Of Your Life Based On How You Emotionally Respond To These Daffodils?” by William Wordsworth

“26 Lit Words You Didn’t Know You Needed In Your Life” by Lewis Carroll

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~ For additional lesson plans and school resources, check here ~

19 comments

  1. Valerie Austyn Reply

    Would love to see some of the student’s text responses….

  2. Clarissa Reply

    GENIUS. I’m going to retitle this article too: “There Are Only 14 Things That Could Make You Smile After A Semester Like This, And We Found Them All For You. #6 Will Literally Kill You!”

  3. Kade Reply

    “One simple yard hack you need to know before your neighbors do!”
    (Robert Frost, “Mending Wall.”)

  4. Kelly Reply

    Guy Finds an Unused Path in the Woods – You Won’t Believe The Difference! By Robert Frost

  5. MVK Reply

    We made up some, too. We were inspired!

    “You Won’t Believe What this Guy Did in the Woods!” By Robert Frost – my friend Ashley

    “A Summer’s Day: 7 ways you’re comparing it wrong” – my friend Carol

    “Ozymandius told him to make a statue- You won’t believe what happened next!” – my friend Carol

    And these were mine:

    “It took Ulysses over a decade to get home. You won’t believe what he does next!”

    “Was George R.R. Martin’s ASOIAF plagiarized from Robert Burns? Read this and decide for yourself.”
    “Is it ok to sleep with him before you’re married? John Donne thinks so. Meet the insect that convinced him!”

  6. tonja Reply

    These were precious and creative. I loved them. Kudos to the teach who came up with them. I would have LOVED to see some of the student responses 😀 That would have been awesome

  7. Heidi Joy Reply

    “Sex on the beach because YOLO” – Dover Beach, Matthew Arnold

  8. Jasmyne-Nicole Walker Reply

    No shade to the imitators, but these were mad hip and now and spoke to the linguistic style of today’s youth, at least what’s in social media. Great job. Haven’t read the poems yet, just titles. So gonna go see if you did anything special to the poem too. But even still, inventive (and useful) click bait.

  9. cate Reply

    “Back When Sh&t Used to be REAL” by Edith Wharton
    “He’s the Boss Now & the Boss 4eva” by T.H. White
    “The Ho That Erryone Kno” by Nathaniel Hawthorne
    “Representin N Hatin” by Jane Austen

  10. icook4u99 Reply

    Two friends go to enjoy wine together. What happens next will hit their friendship like a ton of bricks! (“The Cask of Amontillado”, Edgar Allen Poe)

  11. Jan Reply

    An old retired English teacher salutes you (and wonders how you had the energy and wit to come up with these in June! Thank you!

  12. Fiona McN Reply

    Even better, get the students to make up the headings …

  13. Victoria Griffin Reply

    This is beautiful! Can we have a novel version?

    10 Reasons to Not Get Turnt With Bros – by William Golding

    You’ll Never Guess This Surprising Use for Garlic – by Bram Stoker

    Why Selfies Aren’t Worth It – by Oscar Wilde

  14. Ron Reply

    Totally though “Dis Fruit Ain’t Loyal” was going to be Christina Rossetti’s “Goblin Market.”

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